As part of my role in the synagogue, I often explore ancient stories that hold timeless wisdom for our lives today. This week, I delved into Parashat Vayechi, a section from the Torah that tells the story of Jacob’s final moments with his family.
What struck me most was how deeply relevant this portion is to the families I work with and my own family. It’s a story that reminds us of what truly matters: unity, love, and the strength that comes from standing together, even when life takes us down different paths.
In this parashah, we see Jacob at the end of his life, blessing his children. His family was anything but simple—each child was unique, with their own strengths and flaws. They had conflicts, misunderstandings, and at times, even betrayal. Yet Jacob didn’t demand that his children be the same or follow identical paths. Instead, he found it in his heart to embrace them all, recognizing their individuality as part of the family’s greater purpose.
This resonates so strongly with families today. In a world full of change and complexity, it’s easy to feel divided by our differences. But this portion teaches us that family isn’t about being the same—it’s about holding space for each other’s uniqueness while staying connected through love, respect, and shared values.
Change and Steadfastness
Another powerful lesson I’ve learned is how Jacob navigated change. His life was full of upheaval—moving homes, dealing with loss, and managing family conflicts. Yet he remained steadfast in his purpose, holding onto his values even as the world around him shifted.
Today, families face constant change, whether it’s evolving lifestyles, shifting priorities, or unexpected challenges. This doesn’t mean we need to abandon what’s important. Instead, we can adapt to change while staying rooted in the values that guide us. As Jacob’s story shows, the ability to embrace change and remain committed to our ideals is key to keeping families strong.
The power of reconciliation
The story of Joseph and his brothers is a testament to the power of reconciliation. It’s a rare example in Genesis of a family overcoming deep conflict. Joseph’s brothers once sought to harm him, but through remorse, forgiveness, and a shared sense of responsibility, they found their way back to one another.
This reminds us that while family conflicts are inevitable, they don’t have to define us. With love, understanding, and a willingness to heal, even the most fractured relationships can be mended. The Joseph story encourages us to strive for connection, no matter how challenging it may seem.
What We Can Learn
On his deathbed, Jacob saw his children standing together—a moment of profound unity. It’s a powerful reminder that, as families today, our greatest strength comes not from erasing our differences but from finding ways to stay united despite them.
As I reflect on this, I think about my own family and the lessons my father taught me. Before he passed away, he would often say, “Always unite together, because family is the most important thing. Stay connected to your siblings.” His words were more than advice; they were a guiding principle for how to live a meaningful life. For years, my dad dreamed that I would return to Israel with the girls, the place he held closest to his heart.
Although we came together as a family around his bed in his final days—a moment of profound connection and unity—we haven’t yet made that journey back to Israel. Still, his dream and his words remain with me, serving as a constant reminder of the strength and importance of family. They guide me in nurturing my connection to my loved ones, keeping those bonds strong no matter where life takes us.
This portion reminds us that family is our anchor. It teaches us to embrace one another’s differences, adapt to life’s changes, and hold onto the love and unity that keep us together.
As we approach Shabbat, may we all take a moment to cherish the people closest to us and remember what truly matters.
In the photo: A few years ago, on my father’s birthday.
Shabbat Shalom.
Vered Harel
